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Happiness is a choice

Could it be that happiness is a choice? To make a good choice, an informed choice  there are some important psychological secrets you need to know...



A stone


Think about a stone for a minute. It’s not alive, doesn’t move and has no needs from its environment.


A sunflower.


Now think about a sunflower. It does have needs; for water, sunlight and nutrients from the soil. If its needs are met in balance, the sunflower will flourish.


The sunflower also has an inner guidance system that allows it to turn its head towards the sun as it moves across the sky, making sure it gets its needs for full sun met.


A human being


Human beings also have physical needs, just like the sunflower. But we also have emotional needs and, if those needs are met in balance, we will flourish and feel good about life.


Use your Sat Nav


Human beings also have an inner guidance system, a bit like internal satellite navigation, that will drive you towards getting your needs met.


The father of modern counselling, Carl Rogers recognized it and called it ‘the actualizing tendency.’ see


He said ‘Even a potato growing in a sack, in the dark, in the cellar, will send out shoots towards the light. ’


Emotions are our friends


Turns out our emotions are our real best friends, they are always trying to communicate with us, guiding us to get our needs met. Happiness is a choice when you develop the ability to listen in and understand what  your emotions are trying to tell you.


Depression, anxiety, addictions and low mood are all communications from our emotional brain. You can learn to become your own 'emotional detective' and begin by asking the question


‘which of my emotional meet needs are not being met……. and what can I do about that? What are my choices?


There are nine of these core emotional needs. Getting those needs met in balance is the real secret to psychological wellbeing.


They can be remembered by the acronym SAFE SPACE. and they are like nine secret locks.


The amazing fact is we were born with all the necessary keys to open those locks and enjoy emotional health and wellbeing.


So happiness is a choice when you know the secret.


 Frances A Masters MBACP accred GHGI FRTC

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